You can talk about the shoulder that hurts at the gym.

You can describe a knee injury in considerable detail.

But pain during sex, a change in how you pee, or coming sooner than you want? Those can be harder to bring up.

Suddenly you are searching privately, changing the words you use, and hoping you can work it out without having to say any of it aloud.

In my GETSOME conversation with Dr. Susie Gronski, a pelvic health physical therapist, we talked about the gap between having a concern and feeling able to get help with it.

Part of that gap is information. Some people have never been told that pelvic-health care includes men.

Part of it is the fear of what another person will think when they hear the question. Or what might happen if an examination involves the part of your body you already feel embarrassed about.

Those worries deserve room in the conversation too.

Yes, men have pelvic floors

Pelvic-health conversations are often associated with pregnancy and birth. But they are not limited to those experiences.

Susie’s work includes men’s bladder, bowel and sexual-health concerns. In the episode, she talks about how difficult it can be to find the right care when you don’t know that this kind of support exists.

Learning about pelvic-health care is not the same as diagnosing yourself with a pelvic-floor problem. It gives you another question to ask a qualified provider: “Could a pelvic-health assessment be relevant to what I’m experiencing?”

You do not need to arrive knowing which muscle is involved, what exercise you need, or whether the concern belongs with a physiotherapist at all.

Figuring out an appropriate next step is part of the healthcare conversation.

The fear may start before the appointment

When I asked Susie about what men are afraid of, she brought the conversation back to the experience of saying something private out loud and wondering whether it will be met with judgement.

It is one thing to have a symptom. It is another to be worried that describing it will make someone think differently of you.

You may be wondering whether the clinician has heard this before. Whether you will have to undress. Whether you can ask for an explanation without seeming difficult.

You are allowed to ask those questions before agreeing to an examination. You are also allowed to say that you are nervous.

“I want help with this, but I’m anxious about what the appointment involves. Could you explain it first?”

That is a reasonable place to begin. It is not something you need to get over before you deserve care.

You can ask what will happen before it happens

Susie describes taking time to explain an examination, asking for consent and making room for a person to withdraw that consent. She also talks about adapting how an examination is approached to the individual.

That is her description of her practice, not a promise that every clinic offers the same appointment.

It does give you useful questions to take into your own:

• “What are you recommending, and what would it help you understand?”
• “Does that involve touch or removing clothing?”
• “What are the alternatives if I’m not comfortable with that today?”
• “How do I ask you to pause or stop?”

You can ask for an explanation again if it goes by too quickly. Agreeing to an appointment does not mean you have to agree to every proposed part of it.

The aim is not to make you a medical expert. It is to help you remain part of a conversation about your own body.

“Bodies do body things”

That is a phrase Susie uses in the interview when describing how she prepares people for the possibility of a body response during an examination or treatment.

She talks directly about erections and ejaculation, subjects that someone may be worrying about long before they enter the room. Her emphasis is on explaining and responding professionally rather than adding embarrassment.

What interests me is that she brings the worry into the open. The person does not have to wait for something to happen and then figure out whether it is safe to ask about it.

If this is a concern for you, you can name it beforehand:

“I’m worried my body might react during the exam. Can we talk about how you would handle that?”

You do not have to turn the question into a joke. You do not have to apologise for asking.

You don’t need to turn this into another self-improvement project

Hearing about the pelvic floor can make it tempting to look for an exercise and start doing more of it immediately.

This conversation is not a personalised exercise plan. It is an invitation to find out what kind of support may be appropriate for you.

If pain or a change in physical function is concerning you, speak with a healthcare professional. You don’t need to know what is causing it before asking for help.

And if you have already asked but still don’t understand the next step, it is okay to say that:

“I’m still concerned. What should happen next, and who would be the right person to help?”

You can take your concern seriously without deciding that your body is failing you. You can feel embarrassed and still ask for an explanation.

In Does Your Dick Need Rehab?, Dr. Susie Gronski and I talk about men’s pelvic health, sexual concerns and what it can feel like to receive care without being made to feel ashamed.

Listen to my conversation with Dr. Susie Gronski.

If you’d like more educational material from Susie, she shares videos and live model demonstrations through her paid Patreon community. She offered GETSOME listeners code DRSUSIE15 for 15% off one monthly membership or 30% off an annual membership, valid through November 2, 2026.

This article is educational and does not replace individual healthcare advice.